As my brother Luc Stated, "Don't they know what they are doing to their children??"
The first five years of a child's life decides who they will be, personality wise.
I was taught guilt and shame. My "Granny" had it down to a science. Now I am sure this is how someone taught her.
For example: If Gran would ask me to do something that maybe I did not feel like or did not want to, she would say, "Oh sis, one day you will have to look at granny in that old gray casket and you will remember this day I ask you for something." Did I then do it? You bet your ass I did!!
I spent my life utterly terrified if I did not do as I was asked aomeone would die and it would be my fault. The results of this? I made sure everyone was happy...everyone but me. I grew out of it somewhat. It is still there though. I can still be manipulated because I still hear that voice.
Parents, do not teach shame and guilt. Teach respect and discipline.
And Love them!!
moondove