RaziWorld

The Life and Times of one Dark Divah

6/22/07

Hey Joe? Where’s Kirby?

 In the last few days I have reconnected with someone from my past and while the stroll down memory lane has been a sweet one, I think that I might have to get off of the reminiscing train for a while.

It’s so funny how when you come up on someone you haven’t seen or heard from in a while how quickly they want to shove you into the little box of who you were and don’t really take the time or want to know who it is you are now.

Joe and I were kids ; and I do mean kids…teens; when we last saw each other and today he is 40 to my 38, been married and divorced and at his core is still pretty much the same old Joe I used to know. I’m sort of happy that life seems to have left him un-jaded, me on the other hand?  Well I am not the girl I was once upon a lifetime ago.

Once upon a lifetime ago I used to be a little more shy than I am today, a little introverted, a little reserved and a whole lot quieter. I wasn’t the in your face, don’t fuck with me person I am today. Back then I think I might have had ‘doormat’ tattooed on my forehead. Today if someone tried half the shit that I let people get away with once upon a lifetime ago, I would most likely be sitting in a jail cell.

I make no bones now. I don’t have to ‘qualify’ or conform to anyone’s sense of right, wrong or belonging. Now don’t get me wrong,  it’s not that Joe is trying to do that to me, but I know the path, I know the road and I know the players on this train and save for one other person, there isn’t anyone that I would really go out of my way to reconnect with or have in my life.

I am hoping against hope that he will help to put me in contact with another old friend. Someone to whom I have something that needs to be said. Someone I owe something to and it has been my wish for YEARS to find him and tell him exactly how much he meant to me and exactly how much I appreciated his friendship. Someone who deserves to know that he’s been missed and that there isn’t a single year that has gone by since last I saw him that I don’t think of him fondly and wish the best for him. I want to know that he’s happy and I want to hear it from his own mouth… or in the case of the internet at the very least by his own hand.

Like I have said a million times before… it really is about the little things, and the little things that this friend has done for me should not go unnoticed and should not go without thanks.

Kirby was the shoulder that I cried upon, the one who held my hand just because he could, and the one that hugged me and encouraged me and never expected a single thing in return. Kirby is responsible for me coming to the realization that love truly does know no boundaries. Kirby was my best friend.
I miss him…sometimes more than even I care to say, and I owe him thanks for all that he’s done.

With a little luck and some finesse I think that I might get to reconnect with Kirby soon enough and it doesn’t have to be for long, just long enough for me to give the man his due. There was a time in my life that he was an angel among men and I have wanted to tell him so for what seems like forever and a day.

If I had been wise enough, or mature enough way back when the number of my age still started with a 1, I would have, but in true form and as the old saying goes, you just don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone.

 

 
   Previous Entries
11/7/11  Little Spaces
3/1/10  WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
1/21/10  Been a While
1/19/09  The Surgical Report.
4/11/08  Bye- Bye Belly!
4/2/08  24 Days and Counting…
3/2/08  Happy Birthday Jools!
3/21/08  Do I LOOK Happy?
3/21/08  Surgical Journey ( Entry 1)
2/19/08  The Typical Delphi Argument…
2/19/08  Blessed Beginnings…
2/19/08  * _*
2/14/08  Mea Maxima Culpa…
2/10/08  Ladies First….
1/3/08  Apologize
3/22/08  Upon My Soapbox...
1/7/08  Erase My Post??
1/7/08  Resolution / Revelation
12/26/07  My Favorite Christmas Carols...
2/10/08  Christmas Joys…
12/25/07  Dear God Mother…
12/17/07  Night Before Christmas.-When I Was Young
12/14/07  True by Ryan Cabrera
12/14/07  Dear Son
2/10/08  And So It Begins…
12/6/07  Blessed...
12/3/07  Holiday Party
12/3/07  Incoherent Babbling...
11/21/07  Dear People In My House…
11/22/07  Random Act of Kindness Challenge…
11/20/07  The Dreaded Pap Smear
2/10/08  Say WHAT?
11/22/07  We Got Our Jeans...
11/19/07  Hiatus, Snow and Other Things
10/21/07  Sunday Morning Cluttered Thoughts....
10/19/07  In The Span of a Breath…
11/22/07  Sister, Sister…
10/17/07  Just a Few Random Thoughts…
10/12/07  Do You Believe?
11/22/07  House Full of Crazy....
10/16/07  Racism abounds…
10/8/07  The Darkness... ( No Not the Band...)
10/6/07  Love Your Inner Bitch…
10/1/07  Random Babble....
10/7/07  Opinion- a personal view, attitude...
9/25/07  Lonely ( A Poem)
9/23/07  Moron (the doctor’s visit)
9/20/07  The Time Has Come... pt 2
9/18/07  The Time Has Come...
9/23/07  One Thing... no, not the song...
9/12/07  I Remember…
9/10/07  Not That Innocent...
11/19/07  I Cried...
8/23/07  For Jack....
8/22/07  Just a Little Contemplation....
8/17/07  A few morning poems...
8/2/07  What Could Have Been...
7/27/07  Blattodea??? JUST GROSS!
7/24/07  Constellations..Axis Point... I Love You
7/21/07  Pulling Out the Aces…
7/20/07  All the Small Things….
7/21/07  Simple Forum Commandments
7/6/07  Thank The Gods for the Rain...
7/17/07  Excuse me but…
11/19/07  SICKO....
6/27/07  RIP Chris Benoit?
6/25/07  Take the Kid to the Damned ER!
6/22/07  Hey Joe? Where’s Kirby?
6/20/07  Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!
6/18/07  Me, Myself and I
6/16/07  Dear Patricia
6/17/07  On The Closing of My Forums…
6/14/07  Two of my favorite songs today....
11/22/07  The Prodigal Daughter…
5/1/07  Spring and Other Things...
4/25/07  Worlds Collide…
4/22/07  They Were Dog…
4/21/07  Crude, Rude and Completely Out of Line…
4/20/07  When An Era Ends...
4/15/07  People Put Some Clothes On!
4/14/07  Just Another Day…
4/10/07  Promoting Mr. Pitiful
4/10/07  To all the Gods and Little Fishies...
4/2/07  Dear Neighbor to the left of me
4/1/07  Dear Neighbors…( Social Blunders Style)
2/10/08  Read My Horoscope Today...
3/27/07  Poetry for Women...
3/26/07  I Think That I Shall Cry Today…
3/25/07  Robinhood Fund...
3/24/07  Avalanche! ( A poem)
3/24/07  Going Public….
3/22/07  Prayers for a Friend...
3/17/07  Saturday Prose...(Morning Poetry)
3/15/07  Attention Class…
3/12/07  Hospital Visit…
3/17/07  The Journey Inside of The Journey.
3/8/07  The Rules of (Forum) Engagement
3/12/07  Oh Noez! OMG!
3/2/07  Look Winter…
3/1/07  It Creeps / In You
About the Author
DarkDivah (RaziCichlid)What to say? What to say?
I've been kicking around Delphi since  ohhh about 1999.
I'm an aspiring author and all around nut-job.
I'm a Pagan and my path is wherever my feet happen to take me.
I'm just a little light, just a little dark and a whole lot opinionated.
I'm a free thinker and have no idea whether or not anything I say will be relevant to anyone other than me, but I'm going to say it anyhow.
You can steal my sunshine, but you can't have my thunder.
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