EOBHR

Entirety of Baseball History Replayed!

Love baseball.... but sick of the 3+ hour games  and all the pampered $10+ MILLION/YEAR players...while you now have to skip lunch every other day plus have also completely stopped changing the oil in, or servicing,  your family car just so you can pay for your MLB cable package?!?  Then you may need to use a healthy supplement to reduce or even replace the current 25% of your waking hours watching draggy baseball games, plus the unhealthy brain-warping diet of erectile dysfunction, gout water, automobile, beer, and insurance ads that accompanies them: YES YOU NEED to experience  the efficient, , never-boring, digest-sized baseball world  of EOBHR (The "Entirety of Baseball History Replayed" project)....Wherein a unique possible but not actual history of baseball unfolds in an unpredictable but totally plausible,  entertaining, fascinating, relaxing, mind-blowing, time-efficient way.  EOBHR is now replaying the 1906 season.  Each season consists of a 16 game per team regular season, followed by an NCAA-like tournament among teams that finish in the top half of their organizational unit's standings.   The tournament games count in team win-loss and also in player statistics.   Really, would you rather spend a year plowing  through the HARD-COPY, HERNIA/SLEEP-INDUCING,  NO-HOT-PHOTOS, HARD-COPY 500,000 word  TOME of Tolstoy's War & Peace -- or see a 2-3 hour movie of the same story, loaded with plenty of hot , blouse-ripping actresses -- hunky, ripped actors -- and colorful, head-banging violence??  EOBHR began the project on July 11, 2006 and has now replayed 1903, 1911, 1912, 1914, 1917, 1918, 1923, 1928, 1933, 1937, 1941, 1944, 1949, 1954, 1955,  1958, 1959, 1960, 1964, 1966, 1969, 1970, 1976, 1977, 1980, 1985, 1990, 1993, 1995, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008,  2009, 2010, 2011 & 2012 MLB seasons.  EOBHR staff hands-on manage both sides and records game details real-time as each contest progresses.  You can relive each game by reading the entertaining, succinct, picture-assisted, irreverent game writeups...  A few hours of occasional reading will enable you to relive an entire season in a plausible way that actually ADDS to your appreciation of real baseball by its presentation of surprising what-ifs.... AND IF YOU ENJOY EOBHR, YOU'LL  LIKELY BE IN NIRVANA  WHEN YOU  CUDDLE UP WITH THE SKUNKVILLE SAGA!!! The world's longest (well over 1,500,000+ words), most pictorial (5,000+ photos), with more than 1,000 archived episodes to enjoy...  funniest novel ever written in English or any other language, including Swahilian!.. Kirkus Reviews compares The Skunkville Saga to the works of James Joyce, Thomas Pynchon, & John Barth.  FONT>

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6/5/15

EOBHR#38: DAY 10 OF 16 A.L.

Kitson the Nat's meow in victory over Bosox
The character (a fast-growing young black female slave) found in the epic and compassionate American novel, Uncle Sam's Cabin: Some linguists suggest the popular phrase 'Growin' or goin'' like Topsy!' originated with this character. So, the question is, what would Topsy Hartsel been nicknamed otherwise?

EOBHR#38: DAY 10 OF 16 A.L.

 

 

 

GAME 76:  Washington (6-4/3rd) 2-5-0-4-2

Boston Red Sox (3-7/7th) 0-6-1-4-1

A Frank Kitson 6-hit 31-batters-faced shutout of lowly Boston, A.L. version (3-7). 

The 'real' versions of these two bottom of the barrel role clubs were Nats (55-95), Sox (49-105)...  So, indeed, the better team did in fact win. 

Perhaps it was during this loss that 'Orator' Bill Dinneen (1-2/3.86: with fastball, sharp curve) had the bright idea....Mebbe that poor ump'd be better off facing the catcher's heinie than his mask... And he ended up umping a record 8 World Series...and also called balls & strikes for the first five innings of the Inaugural 1933 All-Star Game... And is the only player to both pitch a no-hitter and umpire one.

In the B2nd of this game, the Sox manager, CF Chick Stahl, a great fielding outfielder, leads off with a single but then Red Morgan smashes a GDP grounder back to unrelated Jake Stahl of the Nats to end the opportunity*. 

*Chick dies at age 34 before the start of the 1907 season. 

 

Piano Legs Hickman strokes a low line 2-run single with 2-out T6th to decide the game in Washington/Kitson's favor. 

If you can't stand the heat, stay out of the Kitson

 

GAME 75: Phila. A's (4-6/6th) 3-7-0

Detroit Tigers (2-8/8th:Last) 2-8-0

After A's slugging 1B Harry Davis (.389/3d/2t/5r/36ab) pokes a one out go-ahead double following an OF Harry Arnbruster similar two-ply slasher, it appears that the actual 78-67 Mackmen may be on their way to an easy victory.

But the toofless (in this replay so fur, but a decent 71-78 in actual '06) Tigers, working on a 7 game losing streak here in '06 EOBHR (all of the losses but one by only 1 or 2 tallies) immediately reply with 2 scores of their own B1st to revoise the lead, 2-1 Tigues. 

First, Tiger 2B Germany Schaefer smacks an infield  single deep into the hole --  (you know, the groundsleepers really should fill-in the rodent subway beneath the playing before the games) -- a play on which A's SS Monte Cross goes far to his right to nab the ball before it disappears into the hole popping up farther out in the OF....And taking advantage of the opportunity per usural, the fabulous Yahoo! Sam Crawford e-mails a game-tying triple far down the RF line.... making it to 3rd before reply (throw to 3rd) to tie the game 1-1.  And reliable Tiger 3B Bill Coughlin keeps the early mauling going by with a line Ribeye single LF: 2-1, Tigers B1st.

Yes, fans: it looks like a high-scoring game in the making! 

But dazzling A's starting P Jim Dygart, who held opposition batters to a depressed .227 BA across his six-year, 57-49, realworld career, and who shuts out the Tigers for the rest of this game, yes, this self-same superman Dygert drives a game-tying triple over speedy Tiger CF Davey Jones' (unhappy Tigers fan, as he follows the play:  'Yep, it's headed twards Davey Jones'....... locker!)....

And another momentous T7th triple, by the A's offensive mini-monster , 5'5" CF Topsy Hartsel (5 realworld A.L. RBI leaderships 1902-08), including 121** ribbies in the real, if in other ways inferior to EOBHR, 1905 season during the A's great early 1900's run) -- Topsy who is nonetheless somehow only 3 for 35 so far in this '06 replay!?! -- briefly breaks out of his slump with the game-winning 2-out triple T7th.... as talented A's starting P Dygert picks up the 3-2 win by going the distance...and driving in 2 runs!   

 

 

 

GAME 74:

Cleveland Naps (8-2/1st) 5-11-1 in 12

N.Y.Highlanders (7-3/2nd) 6-12-2 in12

In this important and hotly contested game,  a N.Y 3-spot is posted in the B1st thanks primarily to a long bases loaded single by cleanup-batting 2B Jimmy Williams.

But the Indians mount their own 3-spot T3rd, making it a a 3-3 tie with the Clevelanders.

Then low-calibre one-spots are fired back and forth between the teams until the 8th, as neither club can seem to achieve more than a one run cushion....  See details below

B4th:  Frank Delahanty, still another Delahanty MLB scion, puts his N.Y. Highlanders on slightly higher ground with his sac fly.  4-3, NY

T5th:  C Harry Bemis' 10th RBI of '06 evens the score 4-4.

B7th:  Willie Keeler long sac fly puts Yanks back ahead.  5-4

T8th:  Claude Rossman RBI single re-knots game 5-5.

B12th (the extra innings here hurting both contenders):  Jimmy Williams singles by reliever Otto Hess, Jimmy swipes 2nd base, slumping Yankee 3B 'Pot' LaPorte rips the walkoff single down the RF line!

Tribe offense takes too many naps, as a result ends up trapped inescapable, churning, evilly bubbling Pot of trouble.

 

 

GAME 73:  1906 St. Louis Browns (5-5/T4th) 3-6-0-6-0  (R-H-E-LOB-DP)

1906 Chicago White Sox (5-5/T4th) 0-3-1-2-1

Only four teams will make the Tourney in the A.L., thus only one of these two teams if the season closed after this game... But of course each team actually still has 6 or 7 regular season games yet to play.

The 1906 White Sox were the team 'famed' in their time as the pennant-winning Hitless Wonders had a .230 team BA, and were also last among all MLB teams in homer-hitting (just 7 dinglers in 154 games!). 

But these Inoffensive Wonder Sox confused their stereotypers back in '06  by upsetting  the all-time-great cross-town Cubs (116-36) in the Whirled Series, those Cubbies of the all-time best MLB season record ever of 116-36 in selfsame 1906 season... a W-L record that has never been matched since.....

Yet in the realworld Chicago vs Chicago Trolley World Series, the Hitless Ones reformed and teed off against the much more esteemed and respected Cubs and great Cubbie pitchers Ed Reulbach and Three-Finger Brown, blasting them  in 8-6 and 8-3 series-clinching Chisox wins!!!

In this EOBHR project featuring a 10% replay of the 1906 regular season, the Hitless Wonders show their worst side in their latest regular season game.... the meek-hitting White Sox losing 3-0 to the St. Louis Browns in this EOBHR AL regular season game.  St. Louis P Jack Powell faces only two Hitless Wonders more (29)  than the bare minimum 27 batters which would represent a complete squelch of the losing team's offense....i.e.,  27 up, 27 down, the  batsmen making 27 straight outs.

While the winning Browns' pitcher, the great Jack Powell, faces only 29 ChiSox in the 9 inning game (2 over the bare minimum), an error by the White Sox hard-hitting SS George Davis on a Brown slugger George Stone deep grounder produces the only run the Browns will need T3rd, and George Stone triples over Sox RF Ed Hahn after Charlie Hemphill draws a walk off losing P Frank Owen T8th for the game's 2nd score...

Then a Brownie great SS Bobby Wallace sac fly in the same B8th sets what becomes the final tally at 3-0 St. Louis: A.L. version.  

These two worthy teams are now each 5-5.... and in all likelihood, only one will make the Tourney.

 

Frankly, was Owen (by George) Stoned (big triple) in T8th?

 

 
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