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For those of you who read my blog that don’t know round about where I live. I live in Ontario Canada, in an area lovingly or not so lovingly known as the snow belt. What does this mean? This means that it wouldn’t be all that odd for it to snow in the freaking middle of July if it wanted to!
Out and about yesterday, running some errands and I couldn’t help but notice that people have done gone crazy. Now mind you the crazy people all seem to be in the 16-24 year age group, but still. The temperature outside yesterday was a balmy 6 Celsius, which converts to roughly 43 Fahrenheit and it was windy as hell so I’m sure there was a wind chill factor in there somewhere.
Now say it with me…. This is NOT t-shirt and shorts weather!
Yes what I saw was person after person running about with T-shirts, no jacket and/or shorts. The whole time I’m thinking, from the warmth of my winter jacket, that the world has even further lost its mind. Of COURSE they were running about, they were fucking freezing and had to do something to stay warm!
One poor girl, although she was wearing a jacket, was in shorts and her legs were bright red from the cold. Now I’ve heard that some people believe in suffering for fashion, but that’s just a little to the extreme if you ask me.
I would rather wear big old ugly baggy sweat pants than be caught dead on a cold day in cream colored shorts and bright red legs, but hey what do I know? Frost bitten legs might be the new in thing this spring. Silly me, I thought dressing for the weather was a matter of common sense, apparently the generation of 16-24 is missing the common sense gene.
And I just have to say it again because I apparently live in the overweight people who love lycra and spandex capital of the world…
People NOOOOOO! For the Gods sake I am begging you put away the lycra tights and spandex shorts and for the love of all things holy look thee in a mirror okay?
If I can count your cellulite ripples through your clothes not only should you not be wearing it, but it’s too damned small and there is no way on this green earth that it will ever look sexy. STOP IT before I end up having some kind of psychotic break over it all. It is NOT eye candy to see your thighs competing. Jeans! Buy thee some jeans, but do make sure they are proper fitting jeans and not 4 sizes too small. It doesn’t matter if they are stretch denim, it won’t stretch that far!
Men? Just DON'T! Men and spandex don't mix. Unless you are built like some Adonis, just don't.
if you must for some ungodly reason wear anything below the belt "skin hugging" go thee to a sporting goods store and by thee a cup. Just ask the nice sales clerk for a cup okay? I promise the purchase will be painless, they over stock X-tra large just for you, and then I won't have to bear witness to your suffocating loins.
And to the two women I saw that were clearly older than I; so at the very least 40 and more than likely 50+. WTH?
1. Whoever told either of you that you would look good dressed in clothing clearly made for 14 year olds should be arrested.
2. The 80’s? Are over, put away the hair spray and the teasing comb.
3. The secret to makeup is to accentuate your natural beauty, I don’t care how much foundation you put on; you will NEVER be able to build a new face out of it so knock it off.
4. Bleached Blonde and Raven Black should never be worn on any woman over 25. Just my opinion. You two looked like some kind of cross between beer goggle beautiful and Halloween chic.