EOBHR

Entirety of Baseball History Replayed!

Love baseball.... but sick of the 3+ hour games  and all the pampered $10+ MILLION/YEAR players...while you now have to skip lunch every other day plus have also completely stopped changing the oil in, or servicing,  your family car just so you can pay for your MLB cable package?!?  Then you may need to use a healthy supplement to reduce or even replace the current 25% of your waking hours watching draggy baseball games, plus the unhealthy brain-warping diet of erectile dysfunction, gout water, automobile, beer, and insurance ads that accompanies them: YES YOU NEED to experience  the efficient, , never-boring, digest-sized baseball world  of EOBHR (The "Entirety of Baseball History Replayed" project)....Wherein a unique possible but not actual history of baseball unfolds in an unpredictable but totally plausible,  entertaining, fascinating, relaxing, mind-blowing, time-efficient way.  EOBHR is now replaying the 1906 season.  Each season consists of a 16 game per team regular season, followed by an NCAA-like tournament among teams that finish in the top half of their organizational unit's standings.   The tournament games count in team win-loss and also in player statistics.   Really, would you rather spend a year plowing  through the HARD-COPY, HERNIA/SLEEP-INDUCING,  NO-HOT-PHOTOS, HARD-COPY 500,000 word  TOME of Tolstoy's War & Peace -- or see a 2-3 hour movie of the same story, loaded with plenty of hot , blouse-ripping actresses -- hunky, ripped actors -- and colorful, head-banging violence??  EOBHR began the project on July 11, 2006 and has now replayed 1903, 1911, 1912, 1914, 1917, 1918, 1923, 1928, 1933, 1937, 1941, 1944, 1949, 1954, 1955,  1958, 1959, 1960, 1964, 1966, 1969, 1970, 1976, 1977, 1980, 1985, 1990, 1993, 1995, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008,  2009, 2010, 2011 & 2012 MLB seasons.  EOBHR staff hands-on manage both sides and records game details real-time as each contest progresses.  You can relive each game by reading the entertaining, succinct, picture-assisted, irreverent game writeups...  A few hours of occasional reading will enable you to relive an entire season in a plausible way that actually ADDS to your appreciation of real baseball by its presentation of surprising what-ifs.... AND IF YOU ENJOY EOBHR, YOU'LL  LIKELY BE IN NIRVANA  WHEN YOU  CUDDLE UP WITH THE SKUNKVILLE SAGA!!! The world's longest (well over 1,500,000+ words), most pictorial (5,000+ photos), with more than 1,000 archived episodes to enjoy...  funniest novel ever written in English or any other language, including Swahilian!.. Kirkus Reviews compares The Skunkville Saga to the works of James Joyce, Thomas Pynchon, & John Barth.  FONT>

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7/2/15

DAY 11 EOBHR#38 1906 A.L.

Doc Newton: 'I love this game...Escpecially after a win like today's...But I have also developed a new snack using the unheralded fig...and'
Fred Glade... A rugged breath of fresh air, awakening Brownies to victory with his stingy offerings to Nats
Harry 'Slippery' Eells, who pitches 9 out of 10 innings but slips away without the Loss

DAY 11 EOBHR#38 1906 A.L.

GAME 84

Cleveland Indians (8-3/T1st) 9-17-1

Boston Red Sox (4-6/7th) 10-16-2 in 10 stanzas

A real blow for the Tribe, who were two games ahead of the N.Y. Highlanders two games ago, but are now merely tied for 1st with the team destined to become the mighty Yankees.

The Bosox surge ahead B1st as great deadball slugger, struggling tho' so far in this replay, Buck Freeman, smashes a 2-out 2-run double to the RCF wall to make it a 3-1 Bosox lead.  In the preceding realworld years of 1899-1901-02-03, Buck amassed unheard-of 25*HR/122RBI (1899), 12HR/114RBI (1901), 11*HR/121*RBI ('02), 13*HR/104*RBI ('03) ('03) Deadball Era slugging totals.  For the Pennsylvania coal country native; Buck born in Catasauqua, PA.  

However, the Red Sox rather quickly relinquish the Freeman-provided lead.... And by the T6th it is 6-3 Tribe, as Cleveland finds Boston starter Harry Eells' pitches not to be that electric, slippery, or evasive after a few innings of experience.  

Slumping Buck Freeman, with just 2 RBI entering this game,  smashes a 2-out 2-run go-ahead double B1st to put the Sox ahead 3-1. 

By 2-out T3rd, though, hot-hitting Tribe C Harry Bemis (.378) has beamed a go-ahead laser of a single into LF and it is 4-3 Indians.  The great Elmer Flick flicks a back to back double following Bunk Congalton's bunker-buster 2-run 2-bagger and Cleveland's lead expands it to a 6-3 double-up.

More scoring by both parties follows but it is still the Indians ahead 8-6 when the great Cleveland HOFer Nap Lajoie lines an insurance double with 2-out T8th. Plus C Harry Bemis hammers a leadoff HR T9th to make it 9-6, and things look mighty bleak for Boston and the home fans.

But the Red Sox continue to fight back, including a big bases loaded single by 2B Hobe Ferris B9th, set up by a hit batsman by the electric starting P Hairy Eels (whoops, make that Harry Eells) to make it a slender 9-8 road Indian advantage. 

Then with Sox on 1st and 3rd, one out B9th, Boston reliever Jesse Tannehill lines the game-tying single into LCF for the suddenly ecstatic home Bostonians.

The Bosox go on to win the game in the B10th against the great Tribe P Addie Joss, working in relief in this critical game... Recent Sox game entrant CF Kip Selbach finally lining the walkoff hit with 2 out B10th, just flicking off the tip of the glove of leaping Indian CF Elmer Flick...  Thus scoring Bosox SS Fred Parent with the walkoff plate-tag.

Game rated PG for Parental Game-deciding plate tag

 

  

 

    

 

GAME 83 

St.  Louis Browns (6-5/T3rd) 12-16-0

Washington Nats (6-5/T3rd) 6-12-1

In the B1st, lefty-batting Honest John Anderson socks a 3-run homer down the short RF line at Boundary Field, destroyed by fire in 1911... Then replaced on the same site by concrete and steel Griffth Stadium, which was demolished in 1965... Replaced by the Howard University Hospital.

This early 3-ply load gives the homeys an Honest John  3-1 lead and anonymously named starting pitcher Charlie Smith (actual 9-start pitcher 1-6/2.91 in real 1906)  a 2-run lead, normally a pretty comfortable feeling even early in the game in 1906, especially at home.

But take that expectation, tie it to a lit stick of Dyn-O-Mite and hurl it as far as you ken... Since the famously hard-hitting Browns (a mighty 659 actual runs in real 1906) tack up a lead-reversing seven spot on the board in the T2nd, adding to that tally with 1 or 2 runs each in the 5th, 6th, and 7th road frames. 

...A ever-increasingly nightmarish experience for the Nats and their loyal fans, as they score 6 runs but are doubled up 12-6 ('Dinner time!!...Juicy steak for Browns, hot-water-logged bloated ballpark weiners for Nats') by the hard-hitting Brownies.

In the B7th, Honest John Anderson  does the Deadball Impossible  for the otherwise hapless home Nationals and pokes his 2nd 3-run homer of the game.....    But by then the road Browns have accumulurateded  12 runs from their own diligentlemanly efforts!

Brownie starter Earl Smith, the only pitcher on their 6-man staff with a realworld ERA above a mere 2.50 (!!), allows Washington 3 runs in the B1st and is replaced by that breath of fresh air T3rd, reliever Fred Glade, a real hero in this unexpected carnival of runs. Glade allows just as much Nat offense (5 hits, 3 runs) as Smith whom he bailed out, but the Fresh Air Man works 7 innings in relief -- compared to the meek two frames hurled by the Browns' #4 starter.

After an error by Nat starter/loser Cy Falkenberg, now 1-3/3.94 in this '06 regag, on a Hartzell tapper,   2 for 14 5'10"/215lb Brownie C 'Tubby' Spencer bops a 2-out T2nd RBI single  into RF to reduce the early Nat lead to 3-2.   

And acrobatic Brown leadoff hitter Topsy Hartzell, who reached on the already noted Falkenberg error, later barrels into Nat C John 'Why didn't you warn me?) Warner, knocking the ball loose (no error ruled), tying the game 3-3 on Charlie Hemphill's routine grounder to second which led to the Topsy-Warner showdown at the platter.

The Browns go on to light up the non-electric scoreboard with 7 T2nd runs, and the Nats diligently keep at it on offense anyway with Anderson's amazing 2nd 3-run homer of the game B7th....

But by the time of that 3-ply blast#2 the Washingtonians find their run budget is far too skimpy to make them any better than a 3rd world baseball squad,  and  they are behind 12-3... 

At game's end, it is dinner time 12-6 after the 2nd 3-ply Anderson contribution, a man seemingly facing the enemy alone while the rest of the team plays politics in the dugout.... Anderson's 2nd  3-run Blast#2 coming with two out B7th, putting a wrap and seal on the game's scoring.

Honest John Anderson, 2HR/6RBI in a one-sided midnight 12:30, i.e.12-6, loss:  Has no comment, refusing even to say the words 'No Comment' or any others.

 

GAME 82 

1906 New York Highlanders (8-3/2nd) 13-15-1 

1906  Philadelphia A's (4-7/6th) 1-3-1

A Bronx Bomber style demolition of the actual 78-67 1906 Athleticos.  The Highlanders of '06 were a Yankee-like actual 90-61, finishing a close 2nd in the 8-team American League, 3 games behind Chicago's 'Hitless Wonder' White Sox.  Connie Mack's A's had won the real A.L. pennant in '05 and would again in '10, '11, and '14.  'Colby' (Coombs' college) Jack Coombs   would peak for the A's with an amazing 31-9/1.30 realworld 1909, and is the starter in this 1906 contest....  But here he falls a little short of his '09 standards, probably his '06 standards as well, being yanked after 3 stanzas for Andy Coakley, 'Colby Jack' having been riddled by 10 hits, 3 walks, a hut butsmun and 10 well earn-ed runs.

Jest befower his departure, as Jack steps behind the mound and repeatedly coombs his hair with his pitching hand (since his glov-ed hand wouldn't werk as well fer setch dooty) after Hal Chase's him with a line single to open the T4th, manager Connie Mack sticks his head out of the dugout, using his rolled up and apparently partially gnawled scorecard/lineup to signal the bullpen to coax young Coakley to stop throwing warm up pitches to one of the stadium vendors, as was the custom in those days, and to get him as fast as possible to the mound!

Coakley, however, is roughed up almost right away for three more Highlander tallies, and as a last resort, the valuable Chief Bender is called upon, or wasted just to protect the A's egos, to bend the minds of the Yankee hitters with his strange 'stuff' for the remainder of the game.

Frank LaPorte, winning Yankee 3rd sacker, comments, 'I almost felt myself somehow TransPorted out of myself by his Benders, making those halpless looking last two outs I made in the later frames.  Frankly... I became confused about which team I was on, what sport it was we were playing, and why there was that peanut-cracking, wize-asked, flask-hipping cross-section of Phiadelphians there watching whatever our work was suppose-ed to be on that severely defined 'playing field...  It didn't seem like no kinda play to me in that heet....with the fans kursing and threatening......throwing anything loose they could find that might sting us a bit....

But Frank (.231: 3-5/d/2r/3rbi) must be pulling our communal mental legs a bit with that exaggeration, based on his smart-looking batting line. 

New York Commands the High Ground in Phillydelphia

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 
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