EOBHR

Entirety of Baseball History Replayed!

Love baseball.... but sick of the 3+ hour games  and all the pampered $10+ MILLION/YEAR players...while you now have to skip lunch every other day plus have also completely stopped changing the oil in, or servicing,  your family car just so you can pay for your MLB cable package?!?  Then you may need to use a healthy supplement to reduce or even replace the current 25% of your waking hours watching draggy baseball games, plus the unhealthy brain-warping diet of erectile dysfunction, gout water, automobile, beer, and insurance ads that accompanies them: YES YOU NEED to experience  the efficient, , never-boring, digest-sized baseball world  of EOBHR (The "Entirety of Baseball History Replayed" project)....Wherein a unique possible but not actual history of baseball unfolds in an unpredictable but totally plausible,  entertaining, fascinating, relaxing, mind-blowing, time-efficient way.  EOBHR is now replaying the 1906 season.  Each season consists of a 16 game per team regular season, followed by an NCAA-like tournament among teams that finish in the top half of their organizational unit's standings.   The tournament games count in team win-loss and also in player statistics.   Really, would you rather spend a year plowing  through the HARD-COPY, HERNIA/SLEEP-INDUCING,  NO-HOT-PHOTOS, HARD-COPY 500,000 word  TOME of Tolstoy's War & Peace -- or see a 2-3 hour movie of the same story, loaded with plenty of hot , blouse-ripping actresses -- hunky, ripped actors -- and colorful, head-banging violence??  EOBHR began the project on July 11, 2006 and has now replayed 1903, 1911, 1912, 1914, 1917, 1918, 1923, 1928, 1933, 1937, 1941, 1944, 1949, 1954, 1955,  1958, 1959, 1960, 1964, 1966, 1969, 1970, 1976, 1977, 1980, 1985, 1990, 1993, 1995, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008,  2009, 2010, 2011 & 2012 MLB seasons.  EOBHR staff hands-on manage both sides and records game details real-time as each contest progresses.  You can relive each game by reading the entertaining, succinct, picture-assisted, irreverent game writeups...  A few hours of occasional reading will enable you to relive an entire season in a plausible way that actually ADDS to your appreciation of real baseball by its presentation of surprising what-ifs.... AND IF YOU ENJOY EOBHR, YOU'LL  LIKELY BE IN NIRVANA  WHEN YOU  CUDDLE UP WITH THE SKUNKVILLE SAGA!!! The world's longest (well over 1,500,000+ words), most pictorial (5,000+ photos), with more than 1,000 archived episodes to enjoy...  funniest novel ever written in English or any other language, including Swahilian!.. Kirkus Reviews compares The Skunkville Saga to the works of James Joyce, Thomas Pynchon, & John Barth.  FONT>

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8/28/14

1980 EOBHR REPLAY #37: DAY 5 N.L.

1980 EOBHR REPLAY #37:  DAY 5 N.L. 

 

65 NM (4-1/T1st) 3-12-1-8  SD (2-3/3xT3rd) 2-5-0-3

After starting out their '80 replay by beating the Braves and Cubs by  a combined score of 19-4 (10-2, 9-2) the Padres, contrary to their own teachings, may have become a bit too prideful (but, let's forgive them...they're only human) as they have no lost their last three in a row , albeit by a much closer 19-14 margin.... Just one more TD and...

In this game, San Diego starts out like they are ready to win, as ultra-hot 1B (I guess his catching days are over at 33!) Gene Tenace drills a 2-out 1st go-ahead line blast that gets by charging LF Stevie Henderson (never much in the field) for a 2-run triple (Gene Richards leadoff hit, Ozzie Smith walk).  Tenace has among the most astounding statlines in the N.L., at game's end: 9 for 20 (.450), 3-1-2-8 power!, and also 7 runs in his mere 21 plate Tenace appearances.

But in the 5th, the Mets get their own 2-out triple from 8-hole batting, great-fielding 2B Doug Flynn, who then scores on winning pitcher Craig Swan's ground single into LF.  And one inning later, T6th, 1B Mike Jorgensen (.368) crushes a game-tying double off the RCF wall scoring speedy Lee Mazzilli, who had reached on his 2nd hit of the game.

Thus, the game is 2-2 entering the T9th.  Talented PH John 'Bad Dude' Stearns laces a leadoff double into the RCF gap, then Flynn singles -- but CF Winfield guns the Bad Dude down at home (isn't that always poor etiquette in Westerns, to gun someone down at home, usually with his back turned, just like Stearns?).  Flynn takes 2nd on the momentarily disappointing play, but with two down Stevie Henderson, another real talent of this era, sends a line base hit into left that has to be taken on the long hop.... allowing Flynn to easily score the go-ahead run.

And Jeff Reardon?  Well, he's pretty important in this game as well.  Jeff enters in the B6th with one out and pitches an amazing 3 2/3 innings of one hit, 12 batters faced, 4 strikeout, no walk, no nonsense of any kind, brass tacks baseball to finish off the game.  This enables his Mets, if they choose, to leisurely score their winning run -- waiting until the last regulation moment, knowing goose eggs will be piling up for the Padres...to serve to the poor, of course!    

Padres:  'We would like to know what that young relief pitcher was Reardon, so we can serve it to our flock!

 

 

64  SC (2-3/5th) 1-5-0-3  LD (3-2/T1st) 2-6-0-7

The Cardinals bunch 3 singles and a Ken Reitz sac fly T2nd against the Dodgers' starting and finishing P Dave Goltz for their only run.  Goltz ends up facing just four St. Louis batters (31) over the minimum (27) for a 9-inning game...i.e., completely squelching, stifling, stuffing, grounding, and falttening the Cardinal offense from then on. 

And that Cardinal lead flies off into the night in about 15 minutes, or until the moment when Ron 'The Penguin'  Cey doubles, advances to 3rd on a Bill Russell single, and scores on a long Steve Yeager sac fly to left B2nd.

Then in the B3rd, Derrell Thomas fists and leadoff single, then two outs later,  Cey waddles down to 1st with a 2-out bases loaded game-winning walk, the last of three smart 2-out Dodger hitters in a row (Dusty BakerSteve Garvey, Cey) who wait for wild John Fulgham to put enough pitches over the plate to be credible.

...And, by gully, that's all I Goltz to Cey about this game

 

 

63  SF (2-3/T4th) 4-8-1  PT (1-4/6th) 3-11-0

Another one-run game.  In this one, speedy OF and offensive dynamo Billy North (.474) smashes a 2-out T7th 3-run double to turn what was a 3-1 game upside down... And great lefty reliever Al Holland (3 innings of hitless, 11 batters faced relief) take starter John Montefusco and the Giants all the way to victory.  North now leads the N.L. in free passes (6) and the replay in steals (4 for 4)! 

A hometeam-chilling North wind blows in Pittsburgh

 

62  HA (3-2/1st) 3-8-1  ME (3-2/T3rd) 2-4-0 

J.R. Richard drives a 2-out 2-run homer down the LF line T4th for the game's 1st scoring AND pitches 6 2/3 innings of 4-hit, 2-run (one earned) baseball in a victorious cause.... But the win goes to relief ace Dave Smith since J.R.'s OWN bad throw to 1st on a Gary Carter one-hopper to the mound brings in the tying run (2-2 tie) B6th... 

And the Stros don't recover the lead until the late date of 2 out T9th when they tally the game's final and decisive run on...good-hitting C Alan Ashby's lead-off bad-hop single by 1B Warren Cromartie, followed by a Rafael 'Land Ahoy!' Landestoy ground out back to ace Montreal reliever Woody Fryman....On which speedy Phillie-born pinch runner Jeff Leonard  moves up to 2nd.... Then a roller back to the mound by PH  Denny Walling, pride of Neptune, NJ, allows Leonard to fly into 3rd.... And finally, Leonard completes his orbit of the bases (well, Ashby actually travelled the first 25% of the orbital path).... On Terry Puhl's infield hit that is stopped by SS Chris Speier, but his kneeling throw doesn't have a prayer of being caught unless Cromartie takes his foot off the first base sack, which he must and does!.... But it's no-win situation as the two-out Infield hit scores the decisive run! 

....Although the Expos do have speedy Tony Bernazard on 1st B9th, potential tying run with no out....But just-into-game young Houston C Luis Pujols guns down potential thief Tony as he tries to reach scoring position by swiping 2nd... But as is so often the case, crime, even a seemingly minor theft like stealing a base in a baseball game... just doesn't seem to pay when all is said and done...!

Thus, reliever Dave Smith faces four batters and gets four outs and wins the game, fanning three of them, plus the intrabase demise of Tony B. described above.  

Houston Pujols -- no Puhls -- out all the stops

 

61  AB (2-3/4th) 3-11-3-7  PH (4-1/1st) 2-7-0-7

41-year-old knuckle-baller Phil 'Knucksie' Niekro (1-1/5.40), a bad-luck (or bad-Braves?) 6-10/3.32 in his EOBHR career prior to this 1980 replay...

...collects 2 hits

....including smashing the winning-margin double, bringing in the 3rd and final Brave run

....plus singles as well

....and pitches a 7-hitter

.....allowing no earned runs

.....as he completely dominates this game

....Knucksie surives a T5th rain delay

....and 3 errors by his mates, including a B5th error by 2B Jerry Royster, the 1st in Royst's 44 game EOBHR career

....and Mandrakes his way out of a tying run on 2nd, lead-reversing run on 2nd rally uprising one out B8th 

.....To defeat the real-world World Champion Phillies 3-2! 

 

Don't Mandrake this Joint*, My Friend...

*  'Joint' = Phillies' Vet erans Stadium...plea from Phillies fan as he sees that Niekro's knuckle-magic is beyond the ken of the Phillie batters and bench strategists 

 

60  CN (1-4/6th/last) 2-4-0  CC (3-2/4th) 3-6-0

The Cubs take an early lead in this one, as Mike Vail whacks a go-ahead single to CF with two out and speedy Lenny Randle on 2nd (leadoff single, Bill Buckner one out groundout with Lenny on the move), Randle coming in to score.  But wiry, powerful Red OF George Foster (.400) reverses the lead B6th in this close game 2-run (Johnny Bench walk) 'long fly' to left... surprisingly, George's  1st RBIs (14HR/45RBI in 187 previous EOBHR replay games) of this '80 replay, making it 2-1 Reds.

However, the final scoring in this quick game is done by the the home Cubbies, as 3 for 17 Cub backstop Tim Blackwell pulls a game-tying triple into the RF corner off tiring starting P Paul Moskau, who is then immediately replaced by Red relief ace Tom Hume.  But 7-hole batting 5'-7"/170lb 2B Mike 'Hoggie' Tyson, no relation to the former boxing great, punches a short fly into LCF on which super-speedy Cincy LF Dave Collins makes a great diving catch....  Still, as fast as he scrambles, Dave is in no position immediately after his catch  -- stretched out on the ground at full extension! (as the great Chris Berman might say) --to make any kind of worthwhile throw home...and even short but stocky C Blackwell saunters in easily to the plate to make it 3-2.

'The Inspector', Red great reliever Bill Caudill, picks up the win, facing just 10 players, one above the minimum, over the last three innings of the close, low-scoring contest.

Reds:  'We feltl like we were confidently walking toward victory, but then suddenly fell into a Black Well!!  The long fall, the concussion, the confusion in the darkness... OMG, it was awful!'

 

 

 
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