EOBHR

Entirety of Baseball History Replayed!

Love baseball.... but sick of the 3+ hour games  and all the pampered $10+ MILLION/YEAR players...while you now have to skip lunch every other day plus have also completely stopped changing the oil in, or servicing,  your family car just so you can pay for your MLB cable package?!?  Then you may need to use a healthy supplement to reduce or even replace the current 25% of your waking hours watching draggy baseball games, plus the unhealthy brain-warping diet of erectile dysfunction, gout water, automobile, beer, and insurance ads that accompanies them: YES YOU NEED to experience  the efficient, , never-boring, digest-sized baseball world  of EOBHR (The "Entirety of Baseball History Replayed" project)....Wherein a unique possible but not actual history of baseball unfolds in an unpredictable but totally plausible,  entertaining, fascinating, relaxing, mind-blowing, time-efficient way.  EOBHR is now replaying the 1906 season.  Each season consists of a 16 game per team regular season, followed by an NCAA-like tournament among teams that finish in the top half of their organizational unit's standings.   The tournament games count in team win-loss and also in player statistics.   Really, would you rather spend a year plowing  through the HARD-COPY, HERNIA/SLEEP-INDUCING,  NO-HOT-PHOTOS, HARD-COPY 500,000 word  TOME of Tolstoy's War & Peace -- or see a 2-3 hour movie of the same story, loaded with plenty of hot , blouse-ripping actresses -- hunky, ripped actors -- and colorful, head-banging violence??  EOBHR began the project on July 11, 2006 and has now replayed 1903, 1911, 1912, 1914, 1917, 1918, 1923, 1928, 1933, 1937, 1941, 1944, 1949, 1954, 1955,  1958, 1959, 1960, 1964, 1966, 1969, 1970, 1976, 1977, 1980, 1985, 1990, 1993, 1995, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008,  2009, 2010, 2011 & 2012 MLB seasons.  EOBHR staff hands-on manage both sides and records game details real-time as each contest progresses.  You can relive each game by reading the entertaining, succinct, picture-assisted, irreverent game writeups...  A few hours of occasional reading will enable you to relive an entire season in a plausible way that actually ADDS to your appreciation of real baseball by its presentation of surprising what-ifs.... AND IF YOU ENJOY EOBHR, YOU'LL  LIKELY BE IN NIRVANA  WHEN YOU  CUDDLE UP WITH THE SKUNKVILLE SAGA!!! The world's longest (well over 1,500,000+ words), most pictorial (5,000+ photos), with more than 1,000 archived episodes to enjoy...  funniest novel ever written in English or any other language, including Swahilian!.. Kirkus Reviews compares The Skunkville Saga to the works of James Joyce, Thomas Pynchon, & John Barth.  FONT>

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4/18/14

1990 EOBHR REPLAY#36: DAY 13 OF 16 A.L.

A's far too much for White Sox in this brawl
'Don't go chasing outside pitches...Please stick to the ones across the plate'
'Okay, I'll see what I can do, beautiful ones...'
Eric: 'Hey, cats... Looka me... I'm no punk -- is I?'
Marshall Law in effect in Boston
Hiyeeeeeeeeee!!!
Uh oh Plop!
Reliever Gary Mielkes save opportunity

1990 EOBHR REPLAY#36: DAY 13 OF 16 A.L.

 

162 MN (6-7/4th-1gT*) 4-8-2 TX (7-6/3rd-2g) 6-10-0

Compared to most recent EOBHR replays, the 8.8 runs/game (both sides) of the 1990 replay is a relatively high total, although only 0.1 or 0.2 above the actual realworld 1990 season (EOBHR '85 = 8.1 runs per game, and even EOBHR '93, on the cusp of the hardcore steroid era = just 8.4 runs . 

Plus, there can be a tendency for scoring to decline a bit towards the end of the replay because a) teams no longer have  much motive to 'save' the better pitchers for a what may be non-existent 'more crucial' opportunities and b) because the Tourney games are generally not that high-scoring since a) the teams with weak pitching staffs usually are not in the Tourney and b) the teams are truly going all-out, or in a poker sense, all-in -- in these life or death games.

This game, however, continues the pattern of strong offenses in this replay.... A total of ten runs being scored, in part a function of Twin starter David West (actual '90: 7-9/5.10; 78BB/146IP), who was for realworld 1990 Twins in fact receiving the only true chance he would ever get at being a regular rotation starter (27GS/2CG).... his next highest number of realworld starts was 14 for the 1994 Phillies.

And the reasons for 6'-6"/220lb West's lack of success as a realworld starter can be seen here: 5 innings of work, 3K/5BB, 8 hits, 5 earned runs allowed... Really, he ('Waystay') was lucky not to have been charged with more runs in this shaky performance.

In the B3rd with 2 outs, and the game scoreless, the great Rafael Palmeiro bashes a bases loaded/clearing double into the LCF gap, giving him the replay lead (both leagues) in hits (24, plus his BA is a high but not-quite-league-leading .429 after the belt) and doubles (8).... and amazingly slugger Raffy has fanned only 5 times!

Marginal Ranger IF Jeff Kunkel then may have his finest moment ever in EOBHR B6th, when he duplicates Palmeiro's bases loaded double routine, although, since Jeff kunks his double with no out rather than Raffy's 2-out job, he records 2 a mere RBI.... As the 3rd base coach is always afraid of waving too many runners home with no one out...because if they're gunned down, when they could just as well have been bothering the pitcher on 3rd with none out, well....enough of those and he is back managing or coaching  in the Piedmont League.

In a late, hurry-up offense attack after majoring mainly in goose eggs througout the contest, Kent Hrbek puts the Twins on the board with his replay-leading 7th (!) dinger of the '90 replay T7th, then T9th  Gary Gaetti clobbers a 3-run blast that just barely misses a low-flying commercial jet... But that is the extent of the noteworthy offense off Nolan Ryan and reliever Gary Mielke, the latter of whom faced and retired two Twinkies for his 1st save.

The Ryan Express is impressive with its clean, mighty 11K/0BB performance!

When given the perfect set-up for one, Gary Mielkes the opportunity of picking up a save

 

 

161 OA (9-4/T1st) 8-12-0 CW (4-9/Lst-2.5gT*) 3-9-2

Rickey Henderson delivers a go-ahead single LF T1st for the 1st place A's, but Dan Pasqua pulls a game-tying triple into the RF corner B1st for the last place Sox.  Then 2 for 40 (that's right folks) Carlton Fisk (entered HOF in 2000) lines a go-ahead single LF to raise his BA to .070 by game's end!

But the A's, now down 2-1 in this heated if wild-swinging early action, as both teams have both been punching for all their worth, more like it's a 3-inning match than a 9-round one.... Terry Steinbach immediately gives Sox P Greg Hibbard a game-tying ride over the top rope as soon as the bell rings for Round 2.

Mike Gallego draws a one out walk to the far corner of the ring (1st base), then P Sanderson moves him up with a sacrifice, taking one on the chin for the team... Next, LF Dan Pasqua 'makes up for' his 1st round 3-count (RBI triple) positive with the point-scoring negative of not having his glove up defensively and therefore dropping on Willie McGee's routine two out fly ball (E7).

Then, with just one minute left in Rount T3rd, Dave Henderson draws a free pass off the wild blows (pitches) of Hibberd, and Terry Steinbach's looping punch into the Sox left ear (LF) is followed by Carney Lansford's winning-margin single punch that skips across 2B Scott Fletcher's face.... Making the score according to the judges and the referee 4-2 after 3 rounds in a 9-round bout...

A bout in which the Sox only land one more solid punch the whole boring rest of the match. and that point is scored on a mere FC by 5 for 46 (all single punches, no combinations so far) Lance Johnson.

A's in TKO of White Sox

    

 

 

160 SE (5-8T5th-1.5g) 6-9-1  CA (9-4/1st+.5g) 9-9-2 in 11

The Angels jump ahead with 4 runs with 2 out B1st against a 26-year-old Randy Johnson, back in the portion of his career when he was as wild (5 walks in 3 2/3 innings) as he was hard to hit.  Hot hitting Angel 2B Donnie Hill (.409, 11 runs) caps the 4-tally rally with a 2-run double down the RF line. 

However, the Mariners accumulate their own cache of four runs between the 2nd and the 5th versus solid Angel hurler Chuck Finley, another big (6'6''/215lb) guy like Johnson (6'10"/225lb).... in a battle of two struggling titans. 

Big, strong Philly born LF Jeff Leonard bashes two doubles in the M's comeback.  And while the M's are on the way up, California also produces an insurance run B4th, leading to the removal of Randy Johnson, and it is 5-4 Angels entering the 6th.

But with two out T6th, occasional Seattles OF starter, big LF Tracy 'Psycho' Jones bloops a two out 2-run game-tying double down the LF line versus soon to depart P Finley, scoring leadoff singler C Scott Bradley and walker Jeff Schaefer....Shaefer's run a good run to have when you're having more than one, since it puts the M's ahead for the very 1st time in this contest!

And so it stands, a tenuous 6-5, road (foreign flag on mast?) Mariners.... as we enter the B8th here, right near the Pacific Ocean in sunny Southern California ('California:  somebody check <as in hat-check> my brain': Alice in Chains).

Now, it might be prudent to note that Johnny Ray sings 'Cry Me a River' to the Mariners as he sppeds to 2nd on a double, scoring speedfreak PR Max Venable (who just swiped SB #5* of replay)...And then, to keep things moving for an important person like we know you are, for whom time is money and 'of the essense', we'll fast forward to the 11th... Since we know you may have much more important things to do than read about the hypnotically fascinating, surreal alter-world of EOBHR... 

B11th:  The entry of end-of-the-pen (e.g., bottom of the barxxxx?.....) reliever Gene Harris coincides with bases on balls (oooh, that would smart -- those MLB bags are heavy, brother!) for the 1st two Angel batters to face Gene, Wally Joyner and Dick Schofield.  Then Harris sends the remaining sun-drenched fans walking back from the exits when he heroically fans the great Chili Davis (although personally, I much prefer the Chilli from TLC: Rozonda Thomas... )

And so all this brings up a starving 1 for 12 Brian Downing to the dinner plate -- and you know how dangerous a slumping star like Downing can be in a situation like this.

Good-bye, fair baseball, as it heads out of the ballyard on its way Down(ing)Town!!!!!

 

 

  

 

159 MB (7-6/T2nd-2g) 16-14-1 NY(6-7/5th-.5gT*) 4-11-2

The Brewers outhit the Yankees by a mere 14-11 in this slugfest, but outscore the actual 1990 last place Bronx Bombers 16-4, in a truly pathetic performance for a Yankee squad.

Yankee starting P, lefty Chuck Cary (11.32) lasts only 2/3rds of an inning, facing all nine Brewers once, and is charged with 6 runs, 4 earned.     Greg Vaughn gets the 6-run T1st started with a 2-run homer....and, against Greg Cadaret, thrown into a relief role due to this disaster, Gary Sheffield finishes the T1st scoring with an RBI single for their 6th run of the T1st... That's right, fans:  6-0 Brewers, T1st. 

Next, Milwaukee tacks on four more runs T3rd as slumping 1 for 16 Paul Monitor connects for a 3-run homer with one out... plus Paulie has a sac fly for the one Milwaukee run T4th.  13-0 Brewers T4th.

The rest of the game is pretty even, the Yankees scoring 4 runs to the Brewers' 3 for the 16-4 final toll.

Milwaukee starting P Mark Knudsen (2-1/2.74) is named EOBHR Star of the Game, the star of the game brought to you by each of the 1,000+ hilarious episodes of the Skunkville Saga, also found here in the Delphi Blog zone. 

Winner Knudsen lasts 8 innings in this slugfest, allowing just 4 runs... Why Yankee reliever Eric Plunk allows an almost obscene 5 RUNS in just a tiny 1/3rd of an inning in the T3rd....while SOTG Knudsen allows just FOUR RUNS in 8 WHOLE, NON-FRACTIONAL INNINGS!

Monitoring Paul Molitor's awful slump:  It continues (.105), as he goes 1 for 5... but Paulie still knocks in four runs in the game, as many as the entire Yankee contingent scores with all of their hitters combined!!

Plunk punk*

*Not as a human being, or in general as a MLB pitcher, but just in this game.

 

158  TO (7-6/2nd-2g) 1-6-0  BR (5-8/Lst-1.5g) 2-6-0

If you like parity, then the A.L. East of this replay is right down your alley.  Not counting the 1st place Orioles (9-4), just 2 games separates 2nd place from 7th/last place in the AL East.  The Red Sox (5-8) still have sole hold on last, even though they defeat the 2nd place Jays (7-6) in this contest,  2-1...Albeit on a very-last-minute 2-out 2-run lead-reversing walkoff HR hooked down the LF line  by powerful  6'-5"/215lb occasional 1B Mike Marshall. 

Marshall is now 5 for 12 in the '90 replay, with a double, 2 homers, and 5 ribbies....also four runs scored.  In his entire EOBHR career so far, Mike is 23 for 70 (.329) with 5 dingers and 12 RBI....not bad at all!

Just as importantly, Roger Clemens (2-1/1.30 in '90, 9-8 CTD) stifles the Jays on six hits, fanning 12, walking three, and allowing only a single 2-out run on a single by rarely-used  Rance Mulliniks .... But rarely used tho' Rance may be in '90, he is 2 for 7 in this replay, and an exceptional 30 for 89 (.337) in his EOBHR CTD with 4 doubles, 2 homers, and 16 RBI!

Marshall Law suddenly goes into effect B9th, abruptly ending game and the vast majority of fans happily streaming towards exits

 

157  KC (5-8/6th-1.5gT*) 1-4-1  BA (9-4/1st+1.5g) 5-8-0 
Thanks to the mighty O's (9-4) winning their last two, and 2nd place Toronto (7-5) LOSING their last three, the Birds have fluttered up to the very top of the A.L. East standings, and in fact have (by 1/2 game) the best record in the A.L. as well.  The Giants (9-3) in the N.L. West are a half-game better than the Orioles.

The 1st O run scored on a 5-31 Finley RBI single after a Bripken (as opposed to Cripken) single and an error by K.C. shortstop Kurt Stillwell

With the score a nail-biting 2-1 B6th, Baltimore.  the game seemed more favorable to the Birds than the Cowtowners.  But the tendency of the Orioles to nest high in the standings tree may have begun to loom more... As the cowtown dugout began to become more silent....restless...cowed?....almost as if you could hear an Oriole feather drop in it.

After CF Steve Finley (.176) was finally walked intentionally with one out B6th, to facilitate a Baltimore inning-ending GDP, up stepped strong-armed but hyper-slumping batter 2-24 RF Brady Anderson....Who of course was more than 'due' (a concept completely despised by SABR rattlers).. But Brady shows those number boys that they need to go rattle their SABRs elsewhere, and not bother trying the scare the poor little Birds or Cowtowners or Brady with them... By smashing a game-deciding 3-run HR to RF!!

Then there were offsetting solo homers B3rd/T4th by Oriole blaster Sam Horn (now with 4HR/7RBI/.389 in 18AB!!!) and K.C. cow-poke Danny Tartabull  (now with 4HR/10RBI/.464 in 28 AB!!!) to bring us up to where this article started, 2-1 O's B6th.....

K.C. cowed by Birds!?

 

 

 

 
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